Confession: I am terrible with plants.
Actually, hold on...
Make that, I was terrible with plants.
Because I'm focusing on growth over here. And not just on the growth of the little garden I've started, but on my growth as a woman as well. Starting with thinking positively and taking intentional action.
I've mentioned before that I'm in a season of change after leaving the job I had devoted myself to for the past seven years. It wasn't a pretty parting, and I'm still working though the complex grief that came with such a drastic and sudden ending. I've been building myself up with lots of creative projects - writing new stories, finishing up old ones, designing things that inspire me, learning to cook. But surprisingly, the biggest comfort of late has been the container garden I started last month.
For years, I've been putting out pots of flowers every spring, only to watch them wither away throughout the summer. I'd have all these visions of window-boxes overflowing with my favorite million bells, of lush hydrangeas and roses spilling into the yard. And every year those visions would flitter away on the breeze, along with my dried up flower petals.
My mom is a wizard with plants. She ran a garden center for awhile, then kept the grounds of the local community college in pristine shape for years before retiring. I always envied her talents, but I was convinced I hadn't inherited them. Why else would my plants always die?
Um, maybe because I always forgot about them. I spent years prioritizing other things - mainly my job and my clients' success - at the expense of nurturing the life around me. Thankfully my husband is a good cook, so he kept the kids and the pets going. But my little plants always wilted away. Just like my own health and happiness wilted away over time as my priorities fell out of balance.
This new season of change? It started out full of sorrow, but it's become a haven of peace. Instead of cramming my days full of trying to please people outside my family, I'm learning to slow down and nurture the ones who matter most. Somehow the intentional act of taking care of my plants - of watching them bloom with consistent attention - has helped me sort out my priorities. I'm learning to take better care of my home, my family, and myself as well. I've never felt more grateful or more excited to see what else I can help bloom into being.
Thanks for letting me share these thoughts with you. Sending you lots of sunshine, crisp breezes, and dreams that bloom into reality every day. Take care of yourself.
xo,
Sarah Madelin
